Listen: Writing about this game is like trying to write about my wedding. I don’t, at the end of the day, have the talent or the vocabulary to truly put down in words what the experience was like. I can tell you that a Bolts win has never felt better, and that Qualcomm has never been louder. Beyond that, as always, I’ll try to provide some insight and some first-hand experience. As always, this week’s column contains uncredited and unappreciated wit and witticisms from Ryan “Leaky Pipes” Thies, JJ “Caaaan Yooouuuu Diiiiiig It?” Fiddler, and Shar “My Wife/Small But Mighty” Higa.
1. I’m going to dispense with this as quickly as possible, because in hindsight it’s disgusting, although it also perfectly encapsulates this season. Driving down, Pipes and I were forlorn. Last week everything was so hyped, and exciting, and shocked—it was a real playoff atmosphere. Today, however, felt like a funeral procession. There wasn’t as much blue and gold on the freeway, the scalpers weren’t making any money, and we heard attendance was going to be down. So, strangely, as we cruised down the 5, praying for rain (because Peyton wilts like a crepe paper flower in the rain), we were faced with a strange realization: the playoffs felt less like the playoffs than week 17.
2. We pull alongside the Marriott as the Colts team bus is leaving, narrowly avoiding getting hit by the police motorcade. Getting shoved aside by Indy doesn’t help our temperaments.
3. There are no horses in the horse trailer.
4. LT’s injury: I haven’t paid this much attention to another man’s groin since…well, since never. It’s troubling my wife.
5. Pre-game they’re playing a Dixie Chicks song called “Let it Rip, Let it Fly” while they show highlights from the season, mostly clips of Rivers’ TDs. Two years ago, it was virtually the same highlight, but starring LT, with “Born to Run” playing. I think that sums up our offensive transition as well as anything.
6. Kickoff—it’s loud. Really loud. Casual fans understand that a loud stadium means more false starts, and a flustered visiting offense. If you’ve never experienced noise like the Q is at kickoff (and I’ve never heard it this loud), then you may not know—it’s so loud, you can’t hear yourself think. You can’t hear your QB, but you can’t hear your wife’s or mother’s voice in the back of your head, trying to comfort you. You—can’t—hear—anything. And that’s what home field advantage is.
7. First Bolts’ TD: the only “Points off” stat kept by statisticians is Points off turnovers, but give credit to Scifres for pinning them inside the five, and the defense for holding them there. That’s seven points off Scifres, and seven points off three-and-out.
8. LT looked awful tentative on that TD. Now I’m worried about his groin again…
9. Second Bolts’ TD, to go up 14-10: Again, Scifres pins them inside the ten, defense keeps them there. 14 points off Scifres/three-and-out.
10. I just saw Willie McGinest on the sideline—apparently he’s doing some TV work, judging from the suit (turns out it’s for NFL Network, Poly fans take note).
11. Twice tonight we’ve almost gotten to Peyton, and twice he’s completed big passes to Anthony Gonzalez. We’re going to have to get some pressure if we want to compete in the second half. Also, LB native Antoine Cason is really struggling on Gonzalez.
12. On the challenge of the kickoff fumble—AGAIN, I ask, where my makeup call at? The Bolts are still owed one game-changing call from the officials.
13. The 72-yard “Nobody’s looking” TD to Wayne was sickening. Coaches out there: who do I blame, a coach or a player, for our defense seeming to not know that the Colts have a hurry-up offense in their pocket?
14. Scifres pins them at the one, defense holds the Colts to three-and-out, we drive down the field and kick the game-tying field goal. We’ve scored 17 points, all of which have come off of Scifres punts inside the ten, and a three-and-out. Somehow we have no turnovers, one sack, are being outgained, and are tied at 17 and going to overtime. The stadium is rocking, I’m feeling nauseous. Not sure my heart can take it.
15. TAILS NEVER FAILS. JJ, you win.
16. Darren has been “one guy” away from a TD almost every time he’s touched the ball—not just this game, but all season. I thought he was going to finally break it on the kickoff and save us all from having coronaries, but no.
17. The way the noise just drops out from under everything as Rivers brings the team to the line is amazing—a sign that this crowd has playoff experience.
18. HE BEAT THE ONE GUY! Darren Sproles just broke around the corner, made Bethea look silly, and went in for the game-winning touchdown. Playoff game-winning touchdown!
19. Bedlam barely describes the Q right now—it’s shaking, even Colts fans aren’t upset, the noise is thunderous, the team is sprinting onto the field, and I’ve lost my voice.
20. Officially, from a quasi-Chargers fans, I’m saying—the three penalties on the game-winning drive officially—really, officially—squares the NFL with the Chargers for the Ed Hochuli incident. Let’s drop it now.
21. On the way out of the stadium, we high-five almost everyone we see, and I’m hugged by four total strangers. I’ve never been at a win like this, here or anywhere else. Truly something special—this team has been waiting for this for…maybe forever. You could never give enough credit to Sproles and Scifres, and to the defense, who held the Colts to 17 points. For the second year in a row, two Chargers were injured against the Colts in the playoffs, and for the second year in a row, one of them stepped up huge, as Antonio Gates had his best game of the yaer.
22. The last time the Chargers lost to a non-AFC East team in the playoffs was 1995, when they lost to the Colts. That’s one reason to root for Baltimore. The other is that if they beat the Dolphins and then win next week, and we win next week, the Chargers will host the AFC Championship. Sounds impossible? Tell me we beat the Colts in OT in the first round of the playoffs after the Falcons loss dropped us to 4-8.