First things first—I’ll admit that last week when I said I’d start doing a Bolts column every week, it’s because I was expecting we’d put our first half/second half trouble behind us.  In other words…I don’t want to write this!  I hate watching the Chargers lose, and it usually produces a pretty bitter column.  But, a promise is a promise, dear reader, and I’d never let you down (whoa noooooo).  As always, these live and unfiltered thoughts from during the game include uncredited and unappreciated comments from Ryan “Leaky Pipes” Thies, JJ “Menu in the Desert” Fiddler, and Shar “My Wife” Higa.

1. The Dolphins won the coin toss and deferred—this isn’t a good sign, because it means they’re smartly coached.  The Bolts have been terrible in the first half, and fiery hot in the second. 

2. Maybe we’re going to make them pay for that smart coaching—we actually look like ourselves on this opening drive.  Two screens to LT, using Buster over the middle, giving Gates some good looks.  This could be the moment…

3. And we’re kicking a field goal.  Goodbye, moment!

4. Most of the rest of the first half is spent yelling, throwing things, and trying to keep JJ (Bolts fan since birth) from breaking my television in half.  Let’s just skip ahead…

5. It’s 17-3 as we head to Papa John’s to pick up pizza.  I’m wondering if it’s not a good idea to just stop watching the first two quarters of these Chargers games.  If I’d watched the second half last week, I would’ve felt great about our performance.  I’m confident about the third and fourth quarters, but concerned, too.  If we keep just laying back and assuming we’ll pour it on in the second half, eventually we’re going to get bit.

6. After a strong drive down the field (our defense is still lacking any kind of intensity and putting no pressure on the QB), Miami misses a field goal.  Then a fast drive by the Chargers leads to a TD, so it’s 17-10 instead of 20-3.  My last point aside: I love the second half.

7. Jacob Hester has a dream play on the kickoff, taking the ball away the way you imagined you could before you ever actually played football.  Man, I love the second half!!

8. So, 4^th and Goal on the one, and Norv gives us what we want—he goes for it, and hands the ball to LT.  But he calls a little off-tackle thing, instead of a Superman jump.  Not to belabor a point I’ve been making all season, but with Lorenzo Neal in the backfield, that would have been a touchdown…

9. Okay, I know we’re all enamored of the Wildcat Wing-T, but did the Chargers coaches not watch tape last weekend?  This doesn’t seem too difficult for me, especially with a strong-tackling corner like Jammer, a huge DT like Jamal, and a very sturdy linebacking corps, even without Merriman. 

10. After that TERRIBLE PI call on Clinton Hart, I’m starting to feel like a conspiracy-peddling Raiders fan.  Is it me, or are the Bolts the recipients of the league’s worst reffing streak in a long, long time?  Or am I just making excuses for our total lack of pressure on Chad Pennington and the fact that we can’t get off the field on third down?  It can be both, right?

11. So, the second-half strategy caught up with us, and we’ve lost to (sob) the Miami (weep) Dolphins.  We’re now (bawl) 2-3, and a full game behind (oh God, why?) the Denver Broncos.  At least my Niners are still in division contention, even after a tough loss to the Pats today.  You want to know the face of being an NFL fan in this crazy season?  The Niners are 2-3, and I’m on top of the world, although worried about playing the Eagles at home.  The Bolts are 2-3 and I’m devastated, but glad that we’re at least going to get to play a soft Patriots team next week.  Huh?